Lazy Football Fan Gifts

'World Cup? Nobody told me there was a football match on!'

"Good game."

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

Football Chameleon

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

Mixed Doubles.

Pregnant Cheerleaders,

Spring Training

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

Periscope spies beautiful water-skier.

"Well, you both sleep eighteen hours a day, so try to coordinate this to find a window for some quality time together..."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

Raheem Sterling

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

Ted's Brilliant Rugby Career Was Plagued By Nagging Injuries,

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Uptight End"

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"My wife wanted to see a diamond. So I took her to a ballgame."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

Zeus injects himself with steroids before throwing lightning bolts