Lawnmower Whisperer Gifts

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

The Gardener's Calendar: Start up the Engine

"Baldo, you've been at that all day! I thought you said you can fix this thing 15 minutes!"

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

Plant Lady

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

An Unexpected Guest.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Garden Goddess.

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Award Winning Gardener

An old man growing berries

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

Sale! Weed Whackers

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

Botany Baby!

"Would it kill you to give me a hug?"

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

Woman in hospital has i.v. attached to plant.

'I slave away all summer getting the garden just right to relax in - then autumn arrives!