Lawn Defense Commander T-Shirts

'Go get the hose, George! That gopher is back!'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"Must get a longer cable."

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I fought the lawn and the lawn won.'

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

Grass huggers.

Dispose of unproductive fruit trees.

Human males marking territory.

Robotic man mowing the lawn

"Ahoy!"

"Don't worry they will find us. We're still in the park..."

A man imagines he looks like a farmer on a tractor on a ride-on mower and

A misery of mole hills

Desert Island in the midst of a lawn dotted with 'Keep of the Grass' signs.

"I'll just mow the lawn then I'll put myself forward to lead the Conservatives."

Snow machine spitting out kids toys left under the snow.

'Well, when can I have my bike back?'

"Hola...I was wondering if you need your lawn mowed."

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

The lawn mowing industry was ripe for innovation.

"This is the worst parade ever."

"I'm going to do some gardening.Have you seen my ear protectors?"

The first sign of spring is landscapers driving by and laughing at my unkempt lawn.

Jim's Mowing Services

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em...so Fred beat all the Dandelions together and made wine!

"Don't even think about it!"

'Yes of course he can borrow my lawn mower just as long as he only uses it in my garden...'

Gale Norton - US Secretary of the Interior.

'The growing field of lawn enforcement'.

"I've discovered why it isn't cutting the grass properly - it's a vacuum cleaner."

"I get more respect wearing a uniform."