
"I'd just like to say that whenever I've needed a policeman I've been able to find one."
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"I'd just like to say that whenever I've needed a policeman I've been able to find one."
What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"
Rejuvenile Delinquents.
One way only.
'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'
'I gotta admit - this 'jury by my peers' idea of yours is looking pretty good.'
'I got a suspended sentence.'
'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'
"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."
"...And now show us what you said."
"The charge is loitering, your honor."
'... Yeah. That just means we aren't much good.'
'What could I have done? The defence's motion was written on legal tender.'
Prosecutor's Office. The judge threw out the confession --- He said it was coerced. You violated the duress code!
'Hey! Kid in the blue! Where'd you get that BEER?'
Jesus Seals the Hick...
'Your honor, when considering sentencing please note that my client drove a hybrid car that gets 80 MPG.'
"Are you wearing a sports bra?"
'We would like you to accompany us to the station, sir!'
"It was 'im wot ruffled me bonce, judge, as I was politely getting into 'is car."
'Does the suicide clause apply if he eats himself to death?'
'Before your honor passes sentence, is the anything my client could do for extra credit, if you know what I mean?'
'And in order to make the experience of court less intimidating...'
'Time's up, chuckles.'
'Let's put it this way, part of you was offside!'
'He promises us manna and give us commandments - Classic bait-and-switch!'
'If this prescription doesn't help, go to Maggie Brown's party next week. There'll be a specialist there.'
Thank God for the misfits and dregs of society!
"For parking in a handicap space, I sentence you to 30 days in a wheelchair!'
'Ronnie has never stopped at amber.'
'There's a policeman here who thinks I shouldn't be talking on the cellphone while driving.'
Desert crawler sees 'No Crawling' sign.
Man stealing a speed camera.
'Ooh look, the Palestinians want to bring a case against Israel!'
There was certainly no arguing Defense Attorney Smith had a point.
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