Law Students Gifts

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

'If a person falls in a department store and there's no one around to see it, do you still have a lawsuit?'

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

Judicial Restraint

Of course everyone likes you. You quit law school.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

"If you really want independence, you should get into contract law."

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

"You're a genius, Shaw. This is an idea whose copyright has expired."

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

I love Lawyers

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

"Hey, I just figured out how to sue the school for loss of my prime childbearing years."

"Now that's a win."

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

Truth

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'