Law Student Gifts

Law School Contracts 101: Writing with words nobody can understand.

'Hmmm...It is: innocent until proven guilty? Or is it: guilty until proven innocent?'

''Congress shall make no law'... now, I wonder what they meant by that...?'

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

Intimidating the witness

'Is there anyway that I could specialize in corporate law and still be one of the good guys.'

"Your Honor, we the jury blame the victim."

Legal Aid Mugger.

Ethical studies: 'No thanks, I;m doing law.'

"Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law."

Legal books - Unwritten laws available on audio cassettes.

'With my degree in law and in physics, I hope to create resonable doubt.'

"Seriously? You refuse to answer based on the fifteenth amendment?"

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

Law school: 'Repeat after me, class 'sue 'em first, or be sued!'

'I'm thinking of dropping out of law school.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse?- But I didn't even know that!'

'I haven't done anything wrong, officer, but I'd appreciate it if you'd read me my rights anyway.'

Law school acronym test.

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

'It's all very well trainees learning in a classroom setting...'

'You can check out that legal text as soon as the computer lets it go.'

'Uh-oh!'

'Hello, Professor. When do we learn billing?'

'First time I've seen a law degree with an expiration date.'

'He's training for a career in law.'

'Of course I speak with forked tongue. I'm a lawyer!'

'I'm the first person in my family to have a shot at white-collar cirme.'

'Before your honor passes sentence, is the anything my client could do for extra credit, if you know what I mean?'

"Why can't I pay my tuition on a contingency fee basis?"

"Professor, I know. Legal judgments made between the months of June and September are summery judgments."

"I was overturned on appeal."

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

"Don't worry about the virus. Of course, you may approach the bench."

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."