Law School Dropout Pillows

I think I'd like to make a motion at this time, your honor, but I cut a lot of classes in law school, and I'm not sure if I should make a motion to strike, or compel, or set aside a judgment, or

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"If you really want independence, you should get into contract law."

"You're a genius, Shaw. This is an idea whose copyright has expired."

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

I love Lawyers

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

"Hey, I just figured out how to sue the school for loss of my prime childbearing years."

Barristers

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Truth

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

Law School teacher.

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

Planet of the Lawyers

Do Guns Kill?

"We make crime pay."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

'I'd like to go back to law school and pay attention this time.'