Law And Order Fanatic Pillows

'After cheating death, I naturally assumed I could cheat taxes, too.'

Who knew yoga was illegal in this village?

Trial by Media

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

Los Angeles' New Smart Meters

'The highest court in the land.'

'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, dummy!'

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

"No offence Jon, but..."

Arrest of La Tuta

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

"Ignore him - he hates everyone I haul in for questioning."

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

"I take it you want to go for a perp walk."

'Dr. McWit, I'm going to have to cite you for violating the laws of gravity.'

'I think we both know that's a decoy.'

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

"It's been in self-drive mode all morning, maybe it's not programmed to recognise stop signs?"

'Okay, just be patient -- it could be months before they learn to obey all of these.'

'We struck these tax laws, but they somehow spontaneously regenerated into line 501(c), section 746-e, subsection (3), as described in paragraph (2).'

Corruption Contest

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'Don't tell me you weren't speeding back there. When you drove by me, all I could see was a blur.'

"If you can prove my innocence to the court, I'll give you half of my cut, from the bank job."