Law And Laughter Lovers T-Shirts

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

A baby in court

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

Judge chasing fly with gavel.

Policeman

We Remove Lawyer Residue

'Do you mean LAWYER?'

All together now! Let's sing our decision!

"I can assure you, Your Honor, that my client knocked over the liquor store with the best of intentions."

Courtroom. Next time I wouldn't say "Convincingly, I hope" when the judge asks how you plead.

'I'd like to have my name legally changed to 'Dot Com.''

"Having a real pitbull for an attorney was great...at first."

It is illegal to fall asleep under a hairdryer in Florida.

'Objection! That could be anybody's footprint!'

Man looking at the cartes de visite of the lawyers in chancery lane

'I wonder what that knocking noise is.'

"I can assure you, Your Honor, my client isn't a flight risk."

'Well, if you DNA made you do it, I'm sentencing your DNA to thirty years in prison.'

'Unzip your pants. . .while you're here, I want to pay up my bill in full.'

'Sorry, Mr. Weinbaum, but you should have said 'Simon says not guilty.''

"You have the right to remain inanimate, but anything you do mime may be used against you in a court of law"

"Case dismissed for obvious reasons."

"Are you aware under the new terrorism laws I can hold you without charge for up to 90 days?"

"So, David. Do you have a permit for that weapon?"

"I'm your Fairy God lawyer and will grant you three Gloria Allreds."

'I'm here for trying to keep my nose clean. I got caught stealing a packet of tissues.'

You ought to be in the funny papers, counselor. That was yet another hilarious objection. Overruled, of course.

'Keyhole Perjury'

'Do you swear to tell the truth even though you'd be crazy not to lie?'

"He said not to ask any questions, but our immigration lawyer wants to hide out here for a few days."

'It's been a long time since we laughed one out of here!'

Law Firm of Kellog and Keith: Never An Ambulance Chaser.