Late-night Gourmet Pillows

"Damn it, who ate all the chèvre?"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

"I hope you don't mind leftovers."

Boy baking a cake.

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

'Haven't you ever heard of warmed up turkey?'

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

"Tia Carmen, I think I'm growing up. I ate five slices of cold pizza at 3 in the morning...and I woke up with a stomachache."

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

Mouse shopping after hours

Pizza and Related Searches.

'Good evening sir.Just wondering if you'd like to sample Night-Mart's new range of A-positive.'

'I don't leave until I've heard all 25 songs.'

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

Man eating his meal with his feet.

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

Diet Enforcer

'That's the last time I have cheese for supper...!'

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

The Cat that Ate the Canary, 3 a.m.

Lunch Broker

I know you wanted a virgin but it's all I could find at this time on a Friday night.

"Back here in 30 minutes?"

A single man can be seen through the front window of the "ME Only Restaurant".

"It's all set. If your husband tries to get into the fridge after 9pm he'll receive an electrical shock

'The students must be back then.'

"I'm sorry you've got a sudden craving for nachos, Mrs. Hacksburry, but I really don't want to open the store right now!"

"Well if bread's free, and gravy's free, how about bread and gravy?"