Late-life Lover T-Shirts

37 years in the same position.

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

'That's true son..Money can't buy happiness. But it makes being unhappy a little easier to live with.'

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

"New money, Bobby, is old money that got away."

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Someday, son...all this will be Mine.'

'You still can't take it with you, but we now offer cloud storage for intellectual properties.'

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."

Family Money - "I've been working on your family tree!"

"I think my fat has GPS. Every time I lose some, it always finds its way back home."

'I never tire of watching Hippies go by: They're so colourful...'

"How long before I have a dad body?"

"How about fashionably never?"

"He said his goal was to make it to 100."

'He says he too would be grinning were he to be adored all over the world.'

Little Known Historical Fact: After regaining consciousness at the last minute, Davey Crockett's coonskin cap went on to become the Alamo's only survivor.

Modern Charm

"Look at it this way - the more birthdays you have, the longer you live!"

'You're lucky, you're one of our few employees that will live long enought to earn a pension.'

'Mike, all I'm saying is, 'Fred' is fine, but 'David' has a nicer ring to it!'

'Your uncle had a very unusual will.'

'...You have some pretty big shoes to fill.'

"Son, this is the key to success - it opens the room where we keep the money."

"75"

"It's simple. Remove everything from your life that you enjoy, so you can live a long, unenjoyable life."