Large Family Comedy Lover Pillows

Yes, they are all dependants."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

Dad Trophies

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

"Okay, just one story. Once upon a time, there was a naughty little boy who wouldn't go to sleep."

"Remember this about new babysitters - making rules and enforcing them are two different things.".

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

"But Mom, you said it was a pup tent!"

'Here's what she was reading - an articl called 'Parents can be fun'.'

"Take it easy, honey. Beneath that terrifying rage is our twelve-year-old daughter. My GOD, when will the wi-fi go back on?!!"

Spider boy

"My homework? It was super easy today. I drew a dragon and daddy did Math."

"Grandma, I have to bring an antique to school. Can I borrow your flip phone?"

'How long did you try before calling?'

"Sure they love us, but once we turn 18 and are no longer a tax deduction, they'll tell us to move out!"

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

'You kids stop fighting or I swear, I will turn this banana around!'

"I've decided to accept my legal counsel's advice and take the fifth."

'It's so embarrassing. My mother had my tadpole tail bronzed!'

"Sure you take off with the flock and leave me here stuck with the kids!"

'My dad cut it. My mother repaired it. Now, I'm looking for some professional maintainance.'

'Could you direct me to the balloon animal enclosure?'

"Honest, D-D-Dad. My report card's 'in the cloud.'"

"Grandma is really nice but she makes a mean cookie."

"Amanda, did you throw you shoes away again?"