Family Sitcom Lovers Pillows

"Take it easy, honey. Beneath that terrifying rage is our twelve-year-old daughter. My GOD, when will the wi-fi go back on?!!"

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

'Well, he definitely has his father's... Er... Eyes.'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

Dad Trophies

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

Yes, they are all dependants."

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Remember this about new babysitters - making rules and enforcing them are two different things.".

"Okay, just one story. Once upon a time, there was a naughty little boy who wouldn't go to sleep."

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

"I'm afraid Dad did not leave us anything of value in his will, but his last wish is for us to continue the feud with the neighbour's cat...

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"But Mom, you said it was a pup tent!"

'Here's what she was reading - an articl called 'Parents can be fun'.'

Spider boy

"My homework? It was super easy today. I drew a dragon and daddy did Math."

"Sure they love us, but once we turn 18 and are no longer a tax deduction, they'll tell us to move out!"

"Grandma, I have to bring an antique to school. Can I borrow your flip phone?"

'How long did you try before calling?'

'You kids stop fighting or I swear, I will turn this banana around!'

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

"Grandma is really nice but she makes a mean cookie."

"C-Span is our reality television."

Bunny TV.

'It's so embarrassing. My mother had my tadpole tail bronzed!'