Language Quirks Admirer Gifts

'You must be the angel of the north.'

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"It lost a little something in translation."

Staff Yearbook

We Will Beat Any Genuine Quote...

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

'Do it write the first time.'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

"They're home...the party's over!"

'Thank god for the spellchecker!'

"I was punctuating sentences long before you guys came along!"

Proof Reading

For Pete's sake, Shirley, stop acting so smug about "getting carded." We were in a library.

Scouse For Beginners

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

Spellng Bee

Oxford Lexicon of Excuses for Bad Grammar and Faulty Spelling.

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

'Yes, sure, certainly, you bet, of course, yeah, right, yep....'

'You understand, of course, that my memoirs must be written in ELITE type.'

Exclamation Marks Chasing the Question Mark.

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

Enoch Powell.

A tour guide speaks in hieroglyphs,

"He spent all morning trying to teach me my own name."

Correct Spelling Lane.

'Really? — the 'Carpe Diem'?'

'Sorry.. I don't date lower-case types.'

"Marie Antoinette? This is she."

"My love language - I give words of affirmation when receiving gifts of cheese."

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

I hear you're sending Rudy to a clandestine meeting with Russian agents for the purpose of coordinating the blackmailing of the American president. What?! I am not! What ever gave you such an outlandish idea? I overheard Rudy asking Siri "How do I say 'hello' in Russian?" That proves nothing. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'my boss wants your boss to blackmail our president' in Russian?" That could mean anything. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'that means exactly what it sounds like it means