Language Punster Pillows

'Stand back, Son. I think Rex has rabbis.'

"My French is OK but you should really see my Reportese..."

'And LET that be a lesson to you! Next time pick on someone your own shoe size!' (the aftermath of a shoe fight)

'When you say that we're a litter are you basically calling us trash?'

'Jim I don't think you have quite go this 'Iron Man Challenge' thing.'

'You daft cow...I said I needed some company and was out for a duck!'

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

Dogs life

K9 Literati

'Out, damned Spot.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

Tequila Mockingbird

'Caesar salad?'

'My teacher is a man of letters...except A and B.'

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

"Ugh! They always spell my name wrong?"

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

Note Book

Mystery of the Poets

"I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?"

Bookworm in book, sign reads: 'Tome, Sweet Tome.'

2B or not 2B

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

Beauty and the Baste

'On Wall Street, both stocks and bonds dropped on news that adversity is good for the soul.'

Pig philosophy class - 'I'm pink, therefore I'm ham'

Optometrist Humor

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

Alternative Dickens: Oliver, having received more, requests a doggy bag.

"I'm not that kind of pro-Bono lawyer."

"Norman is an island."

'I think therefore I ham.'

Since you conduct only thought-experiments, we were hoping you would, from time to time, come up with some thought-results.

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'