Language Libertarian Gifts

UK Censors Office...

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

Campaign for Plain English

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Backfire

Punctuation Police

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

Assault 'n' Vinegar

What's normal?

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

Lesser known greek gods,

'The Questioner'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"Nuts to you, too."

"Ahhh....I think that was a flying fuck."

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"