Language Game Player Gifts

'The prinker liked to japan his krimmer.'

Honey Comb

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

Introducing...Anagraman.

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Marco ..."

Some card-game puns

"I stand corrected."

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"Today I came across antiderenuclearizationalityness."

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

"I said to get a Tomcat, not a wombat!"

F&E Stables. Horses Boarded. The owner of this horse is a huge fan of the late musician, "Prince." That explains the purple reins.

Danth battle?

Typical bored kid of the New Millennium

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

"That's not what I meant by changing gear, Mrs.Robinson!"

Shoe repair

Spot the fur ball.

"I'll tell you how much wood I could chuck if I could—a lot, like, half a cord!"

Strawberry Shake

"Wall to wall carpet. Shouldn't that be wall to wall to wall to wall carpet?"

"I've been window-shopping..."

'So I said 'You must be frackin' joking!''

Self Raising Flour

Pets. Puppy Yums. Fish. I need parrot sales figures and a kitten inventory estimate. I'll do a polly graph and a cat scan!

Heart To Heart

"He ate all the Scrabble tiles. Now he keeps leaving little messages around the house."