Landscape Whisperer Gifts

A Gardener's Calendar: January - This is the most convenient time to work out your plans for the year.

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

The Busy Gardener

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Gardener

Plant Lady

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

An Unexpected Guest.

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

Garden Goddess.

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"Would it kill you to give me a hug?"

Botany Baby!

"I'm losing my patience with you."

An old man growing berries

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

Award Winning Gardener