Lads' Night Pillows

Wide screen TV

I could have danced all night!

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

Superheroes Having a Drink

Joe's 'Talent-Optional' Karaoke Bar

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Bingo night.

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

"At our age we should be moisturizing." "Honey, we started years ago... with our lips."

Playing cards.

"Botox."

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

"Let's see now - have we got everything?"

Down on Bourbon Street...

'Botox...'

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

"I don't mind you spending the weekend at the lake with the boys, but don't push your luck by bringing home fish."

You have had enough

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

The Stages of Wine

"Your shout!"

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

Gorgeous Groovers.

'He hasn't taken his eyes off us all evening-he's watching us like a Mo-hawk!'

Absinthe Fairy.

"Let's face it, Michele. We're not getting any older."

''Fancy a quick pint?'

'He uses the leg rope in the water and she uses it out of the water!'

"The only thing that still works well for me is hysteria."