Label Linguist Gifts

'Now with 30% less crap you can't even pronounce!'

Let's get organized

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

Punctuation Police

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

What's normal?

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

'The Questioner'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Lessons in Prehistory.

"Let's fall in love and live in the subjunctive."

'Stick them up...'

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

'She speaks 6 languages and can't say 'No' in any of them. . .'

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

Thesaurus Publishing: Out, Not here, Gone, Absent.