Knight Of Snacks Gifts

'I was like working at burger buddies and this guy was mad because his fries were like old and stuff...'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"Trail mix?"

Jewish Geometry

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

"You're really not too extreme, huh?"

Future Wrestler

"Serves you right...snacking before dinner."

Breakfast surreal.

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

'Popcorn? Sure. Would you like huge, mega, super-duper huge or gigundazillion multi multi really insanely huge?'

'Sticky nuts...' "Umm nice nuts but not as sticky as us buns!!"

"Croissants? Donuts? Chocolate? Good price, madame! Good price!"

'Ironically, sportswear is the most comfortable clothing for doing nothing in.'

Game Addiction

Military man has pigeons lined up in front of him.

'I've decided to get serious about losing weight. I moved the refrigerator out of my bedroom.'

Greedy child

"We're out of empanadas!"

Woman on diet being chased by temptation.

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

'Organically-grown popcorn? Give me a break!'

'Are you sure sitting on a bean bag chair isn't considered getting a daily requirement of vegetables?'

"And this is my husband...he's into energy conservation, mostly his own!"

'Double cheeseburger, large drink, fries, apple pie, chocolate sundae and an antacid, please.'

'But who comforts the comfort food? I'll tell you who: NOBODY.'

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

"This sub tastes much better with some traffic jam."

''Pop'? In my part of the country they're called a 'Soda-Tart'.'

"Fetus?"

"Most men have a tankard, but oh no, not you."

'Boy! Did I get some bad news today! I found out french fries is a veg'table!'

You really gorge yourself on sports. THEY score and YOU take a victory lap through the kitchen.!