Knife Collection Pillows

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

The Missing Sock Returns

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

'I love it when you spoon me.' 'I love it when you fork me.'

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"Harry?... Is that you?"

"Just what is a runcible spoon?"

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

'This will only hurt for a moment.'

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

'I'll be the back yard cutting firewood. Have you seen my protective goggles?. . .Well, luckily I kept my old hockey mask!'

"You see, honey, no lousy coronavirus is gonna get to us way out here."

'None shall pass!'

Harold was pleased to discover that his grandson was also a big tool fan.

Scales

"Don't let it bother you. The doctor told my wife it would keep her mind sharp if she learned a new skill."

Squeal like a pig!

A man in bathrobe smoking a pipe sits in an armchair as a dog delivers endless pairs of shoes and boots to him.

"You have ice water in your veins."

'It's a spork!'

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

"So unfortunately, I have to make some more cuts."

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

A Fork-lift.

'I don't know what happened. One minute she's spooning me. The next minute I'm knifing her.'

Jar Wars: 'Use the forks Luke... Use the forks!'

Armless chainsaw juggler.

'No fair, man. How come you get a dessert fork?'

Why Running Away Together Is Not a Very Good Idea...

A chef uses a giant utensil to chop a tiny sausage.

Origin of the 'spork'

Modern Furniture/Sculptures Object to Old Fashioned Chair.

Looking Daggers

Anarchist Cutlery: Soup Knife/ Bread Fork, Steak Spoon.

Swiss excalibur...