Kitty Chaos Navigator Gifts

"Can you ad a few extra anti-scratch coatings to my lenses, please."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Mittens is challenged by the string.

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

Woman with kids at husbands office.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

Stubborn Horse

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

How to correctly estimate cooking time

"Mom, can you come get me?"

Signs of Stress

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

A dream of consequence

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

Having It All

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

Tax Department - Whammy/double whammy

"I love what you've done to the place."

Department to Control Government Growth - 'We need more room.'

"It's funny how that works. It doesn't matter where I am in the house... I can always tell when the novel isn't going well."

Working from home.

Going to the pub with kids...

Married Life - Poet unable to write because of noisy children

Cat chess

"Don't worry. I'll be right back. I just need a little space."

"Frank?"