Kitchen Witchery T-Shirts

"Did you remove the bay leaf?"

Come dine with me!

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

Hungry child

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

'Needs salt!'

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

Benihana style of cooking.

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

You're the sizzle in my roast!

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

"Voila!...smooth pastry." (Lady teaching chef to iron dough).

Surprise in the salad bowl

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

Hot pot

A Creature WAS Stirring

'Preparing free-range chicken requires an extremely patient chef.'

"I'm making your favorite dessert, dear … seven layer cake."

"More?"

The legend of Chef Arthur.

"Fridge-to-table"

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

Bake-a-thon.

'Memorable miracles' from 'burning bush' to 'low cal ice cream'

"Congratulations! You unlocked the devil in your coffee. Microwave a seventh time and you'll meet L. Ron Hubbard."

For my next trick, I will cut this freshly baked baguette in half using a non serrated blade.

"It's good to see that... ...Tia Carmen teaching Gracie valuable family traditions passed down through the generations."

Oh you smoothie

Chef's Surprise: "I'm telling everyone that tonight's special is Osso Bucco."

Come dine with me!

'You followed the recipie but it's missing the secret ingredient: Mom.'

"God has just spoken to me. He said he's kind of tired of pasta."