Kitchen Management Pillows

Health and safety at work.

'I'm a self-starter unfortunately I'm also a self-finisher.'

'It says here we don't have to report minor injuries.'

'I'm not worried about terrorists, I'm cleaning out the fridge.'

'What's wrong, dear? You haven't magnetized anything to the refrigerator in days.'

"If you liked tonight's meal, you might enjoy 'Making The Meal,' a documentary with outtakes and commentary when the cook ran out of eggs because someone put an empty carton back in the refrigerator..."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Counting ribs

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

Soup of the month.

"That's it. We’re toast."

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Too much cilantro

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Kitchen Kapers

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

Salt and Pepper

The Perfect Foil

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

Chef copy robot

'Cooking'

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Ghostbasters 3

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

Kiss the Commander in Chef

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"