Kitchen Crisis Manager Pillows

"Yesterday my frig stunk real bad! But now it doesn't! I musta eaten whatever it was!"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

BBC - Crisis Management, Damage Control and Liability Supervision.

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Kitchen Tetris

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

Personnel. Any experience in crisis management? No...Just production.

Kiss the Commander in Chef

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

'So, how bad is it? Who can bring me up to speed?'

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

The secret lives of household things.

"I wanted to always play it down. I still like playing it down because I don’t want to create a panic."

'We should e-mail this and point out that many of our victims were in key marginals...'

10 Commandments if God was a Woman...

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

"I'm an expert in crisis management, I've got three daughters!"

"Baxter, I've decided to take you off crisis management."

"I'm concerned, Larry. All you seem to do lately is put out fires and run around like a..."

The inevitable conflict of interest facing every crisis manager.

Emergency Firebreaker

"It got so bad that had to bring Jones in to turn things around."