Kitchen Gym-goer Gifts

Exercise and diet at the same time - open and close your refrigerator door 100 times.

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

Sleepwalker on treadmill

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

"We're exclusively delts."

"We hang like this for the incredible ab workout."

Where Skim Milk comes from.

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

'I just don't feel I'm getting anywhere.'

Bench Press Accident

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

Exercising

'Every new year Gym membership goes up - for the Panto season.'

Woman walks her dog on a running machine.

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

Boy with bat using toaster to launch bread for him to practise hitting

"All those years of diversity training, seminars and research papers to shred the idea of male superiority....When all we really needed...was for them to train like the Lionesses for 20 minutes."

Keep Fit.

"Well, that will never be a yoga pose."

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

John liked to involve his pet snake in his keep-fit programme.

"This is Chance. When he first came here he was a fat Chance. Now he's a slim Chance."

After working out in the congressional gym, I feel like a lean, mean, legislating machine.

Yoga for beginners,

'What, you afraid of a little exercise?'

'Checkmate!'

'You have to start exercising. Running your mouth, skipping lunch and jumping to conclusions won't help you tone up and lose weight.'

"Keep goin', Harry. No pain, no gain!"

James's Mayfair Gym - Punting Machine.

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?