Kitchen Gadgeteer T-Shirts

'Teachers can't be bought off with apples today. Maybe if I gave her small kitchen appliances?'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

GMOs: The Next Generation

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"I'd like to toast our guests."

"You're never home."

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

'Mom, what setting do you use for warming up slippers?'

The secret lives of household things.

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

"Doctor. I am speechless"

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

"My compliments to the can opener."

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

'The chef is just making your cheesecake now, sir.'

"Congratulations! You unlocked the devil in your coffee. Microwave a seventh time and you'll meet L. Ron Hubbard."

'Memorable miracles' from 'burning bush' to 'low cal ice cream'

'Drat - the water purifier is on backwards.'

Onion Guillotine

Microwave. Do you have any idea of the time pressure I'm under?

"To toast!"

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."