Kitchen Gadget Fan Pillows

'Excuse me sir, how do you feel about artificial intelligence?'

'Thanks for the best birthday gift I ever got...a slow cooker.'

Nacho Shears

"Find help!"

If they can put a man on the moon, then why can't they... manufacture ice cube trays that allow for easy removal of the cubes!?

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'And this is a voucher for a free toaster. . . you know, once those are invented.'

Microphone Feedback

'I know junk e-mail is everywhere but spam on toast?'

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Fridge-to-table"

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

'Drat - the water purifier is on backwards.'

Tin Opening

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

Spiro & Pusho mincing fish in meat mincer.

Swiss Kitchen

Wall Cluck.

"Butt cracker"

'All the money we saved buying bulk food on sale we blew on this huge freezer!'

"For your birthday, I got you a food processor!"

Archeology Exhibit. When sifting through landfills, future archeologists will identify the immediate post-pandemic period by the abundant, discarded bread makers.

'Very impressive resume... new printer?'

Your appliance maintenance agreement just expired. I'm here for your appliance...'

"How do I turn Alexa off?"

101 uses of a dead cat: chopping board.

'Fish fresh?' 'I don't know I've only been here two weeks .'

I'd like to help, ma'am, but your dishwasher came with a "do not resuscitate" order.

"Jean-Pierre, homemade caviar for table six, please!"

"Look what I found on sale! Measuring cups to use for all your recipes!"

"Err... Excuse me Sir, you've forgotten the user manual for your super mini mobile."