Kitchen Commandos Gifts

'Ok Grandma...Are we ready to make those brownies we talked about?'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Kiss the Commander in Chef

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

A butcher and his apprentice.

10 Commandments if God was a Woman...

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

Cook and Octopus

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

No fly zone

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

'This week, the secret ingredient on Iron chef is . . . Iron. Good luck, suckas.'

"Okay, I get the message."

"General Tso and his chicken"

"Is this the table with a complaint?"

'Hello, police? There's been a food fight here and I'm afraid the cheese got the worse of it.'

'Darling, whip me something up in the kitchen.'

"There's the handoff, and it looks like Dad is going to go with an option route, avoiding the rush from the dishwasher, sweeping left, evading the teenager blitz and heading directly to the liquor store!"

'In spite of all our communication gadgets, the fridge is still the undisputed information center of our household.'

Omelette aux grosses herbes

Pizza Fencing

If they can put a man on the moon, then why can't they... develop a clear plastic wrap that doesn't bunch up!?

"This Bounty is useless against the Quicker Messer Maker."