Kitchen Chaos Champion Pillows

"The shrimp alfredo you made a few weeks ago?"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

Kitchen Tetris

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

Man's cooking explodes.

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

Ten out of ten for effort...

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Chef De Party.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

Bake off: Flan B

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Disaster in the kitchen.

Cooking

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

Woman in need of an extractor fan.

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

"I mean, he does have a point."

Cook au vin

One reason secret family recipes are usually best kept secret.

"Glad you have time for lunch today, honey."

Chef looking up confused, Waiter behind him with pancake on his head.