Kitchen Catastrophe Architects T-Shirts

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Roasted

'Anybody for breakfast?'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

'My hero!'

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"Larry's made new friends learning to cook. He knows everyone at the Recipe Emergency Hotline."

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

"You've actually done something even Gordon Ramsay can't do-burn the salad!"

Mixed marriage: food fight

"Maybe we were wrong to hire him just because he looks good in paper."

'Is it still edible?'

"I know I said I was hungry, but I'm not that hungry."

'Honey, I think you have an error message coming in from the kitchen.'

Paramedics carrying a man away after his dinner.

"Do you mind if your soup is a bit crunchy?"

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'Today was a bit of a disaster.' - 'First I cut my finger and bled everywhere, then I lost my plaster while I was cooking.' - 'Do you want the last bowl of pumpkin soup?' - 'No, it's okay. You go for it.'

"There's something wrong with your dinner."

"I never use the oven timer. The smoke alarms are louder."

Dave's How to Puke Book.

'Call an emergency church supper! The freezer's gone out!'

'That new recipe didn't quite work out. Do you fancy popping down to the chippy?'

"I can hear the smoke alarm.Is dinner ready?"

Honey, come eat your oatmeal before it sets!

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'

'Not to worry Flo - It's only Sid's dinner.'

Setting fire to the Christmas Pud.

"There's been an accident in the kitchen." "I know, I've just eaten it."