Kitchen Catastrophe Architects T-Shirts

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Roasted

'Anybody for breakfast?'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'My hero!'

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'

Mixed marriage: food fight

"You've actually done something even Gordon Ramsay can't do-burn the salad!"

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

"Larry's made new friends learning to cook. He knows everyone at the Recipe Emergency Hotline."

"Maybe we were wrong to hire him just because he looks good in paper."

'Is it still edible?'

"I know I said I was hungry, but I'm not that hungry."

Paramedics carrying a man away after his dinner.

'Honey, I think you have an error message coming in from the kitchen.'

"Do you mind if your soup is a bit crunchy?"

Dave's How to Puke Book.

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

"There's something wrong with your dinner."

'Today was a bit of a disaster.' - 'First I cut my finger and bled everywhere, then I lost my plaster while I was cooking.' - 'Do you want the last bowl of pumpkin soup?' - 'No, it's okay. You go for it.'

"I never use the oven timer. The smoke alarms are louder."

'Call an emergency church supper! The freezer's gone out!'

"Honey, dinner's ready! I just have to find it."

'That new recipe didn't quite work out. Do you fancy popping down to the chippy?'

Honey, come eat your oatmeal before it sets!

"I can hear the smoke alarm.Is dinner ready?"

"There's been an accident in the kitchen." "I know, I've just eaten it."

Setting fire to the Christmas Pud.

'Not to worry Flo - It's only Sid's dinner.'