Kitchen Captain T-Shirts

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Kitchen Kapers

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Is that pancake ready yet?

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

Chef copy robot

'Cooking'

Kiss the Commander in Chef

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Ghostbasters 3

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"My God!!..Just how long have we had this Broccoli hiding in the back of the fridge?"

"I got the part, but I play a waiter."

Will work for Food Network.

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

The secret lives of household things.

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

Funky Chef 2

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

A butcher and his apprentice.

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

"Did you manage to pass the buck on our dodgy food?"

Murderous Chef

"Toby - you did book the relief chef, right?"

Egg Surprise