Kitchen Anarchist Gifts

Anarchist Cutlery: Soup Knife/ Bread Fork, Steak Spoon.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

You're the puff in my pastry!

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

The Origins of Everything

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

I made you a cake!

"Impressive, yes, but what exactly is a black belt in cookery?"

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

The Inexperienced Cook

'The cake timer dinged, Mom, and so did my stomach.'

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

"I just don't want to be 'that' waffle."

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

A butcher and his apprentice.

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

'There always seems to be ONE trouble-maker in the company who gets a sick thrill from rebelling against our corporate culture!'

Time for pancakes!

Mrs Jones's fish pie could be smelt for miles around!

'Most, yes, but they're not all carcinogenic!'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

'If they rise they're scones. If not they're pancakes.'

"I've been a chef for far too long...."