King-loving Friend Gifts

'So you lost the war -- it's still a personal best!'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

'Now that's an afro!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

King George I

"He's his own worst enemy."

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"The knights of the round accent table"

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

'The Burrito King.'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

The Unhappy King

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'The Saxon King' pub

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

Royal Love

'He followed me home, Dad -- can I oppress him?'

Medieval headlines.

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

"Someone should have warned you - he doesn't suffer fools gladly."

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may tend to hurt sales of my 'tell-all' book."