Kids' Book Collector T-Shirts

Author book signing 'Wimpy Kid Diary'!

"Stick 'em up."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Rare Books

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Characters jumping out of a book.

Great British Eccentrics.

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

Sue the Author 3PM

You've read the book's dust jacket. Now, play the video game!

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

Sock Puppet in Literature

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

The Shrinking Dollar.

Baby Einstein. Baby Frankenstein.