Kick-off Enthusiast Pillows

David Beckham

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

First Prize!

Sudok Fu: Sign up for class today!

Punishment for the kicker.

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

'Quit playing kick ball with your brother!'

The Goal Post-Impressionists,

Bradley Wiggins

"...and I'm an incredibly flexible gymnast. If you get my drift..."

...Another second closer to kick-off....another second..

"Who's there?" "Who's askin'!?"

'Try to keep the number of your landings equal to the number of your takeoffs!'

Champion.

'Did you feel the baby kick that time, hon?'

World Cup Football Enthusiasm!

Winning athlete collapsed on podium.

High Kick

Mohamed Salah

The Motives of Footballers

"Flavor? It's 'let me drink my first cup before I stab you in the eyes' flavor."

"Where are you flying to?"

Karim Benzema

"We call it that because Pastor Dave is always aware of kick-off time."

Fernando Torres

Kick-line Deer Crossing. A kick-line of deer cross the road Radio City Rockettes style.

Slob man says to fitness-fan wife: 'Couch potato is such an offensive term ... we prefer furniture-based leisure prioritisers.'

Football

'Apart from the vuvuzela incident did you enjoy England's World Cup games?'

"I want a frieze around the pool house depicting the defeat of my business rivals."

Footballers chasing a ball.

Spying on the Football Match