Khaki Collector Pillows

"What's the big deal? When I was in the war, damn near everybody wore khakis!"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Raincloud Umbrella

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Duck Hunt

Early cyborg.

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Best before 65 million BC.

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Letter Collecting Nerd

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

A watch face with Stonehenge

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

Ice shelfie.

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

It's great for pulling the birds!

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."