Kabuki Enthusiast Pillows

"Tuesday nights are Ed's Kabuki League bowl-offs."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

The Vineyard

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

"Yeah, it's me. I'm gonna be late for dinner."

"Which part are you reading for?"

Official Fight Cards

Skiing

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

"Relax, I'll go back and find it."

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

'I'm pretty sleepy tonight, Dad - could we just skip ahead to the chase scene?'

"Here comes the super-visor."

Clandestine cows.

"Open up for the choo-choo train!"

What it takes to be a leader.

No one ever tried to rob the Samurai Bank.

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

"Building a ninja-attracting business culture is easy. Keeping them focused on equity-based financial analysis? Not so easy."

Great-Great-Grandson of Godzilla

A tailor measuring a jacket.

'Instead of a black belt, some of our older students, like Mr. Mertz here, prefer the black suspenders.'

'So, were we entertained tonight, or just bludgeoned into submission?'

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

Stuntmen Directions

'I see you worked in government research - what kind?'

"Would you like any suburbs, or just the check?"

Monster Souvenir

Because bubble wrap made it hard to sneak up on their targets, ninjas eventually switched to their familiar black outfits.

Another use for retired sumo wrestlers: Roundabout ahead.