Junkyard Warrior Gifts

' ... or you could park it near the Dynamite Shack at Klutz Construction.'

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

Man with raked leaves on wall plaques.

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"Would it kill you to compost?"

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

'Since he bought the leaf blower I hardly ever see him.'

"Must get a longer cable."

'Filthy Earthlings got here before us!'

"Can't wait to see the look on his face when we put these back on the tree."

'What's the difference? It was a man-made lake in the first place.'

When Fred's super deluxe leaf blower blew up yet again, he wondered where global deforestation is when you want it,

'Like the 'Cobra' and the 'Viper', my car is named for a snake too - the 'Rattler'.'

We need an eco project that actually changes things. Ha! Good luck. Eco-club. Hey! We cut the school's use of plastic bottles 50% from last fall. Ahem. This year I feel 50% guiltier.

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

Recycle or ruin the planet?

"You put your family in with the aluminum cans again, Mrs. Price."

"What a magnificent display of fall foliage – a blessing to behold." "*!#@!%* leaves!..."

Recycling Depot - Magazines, Newspapers, Free CDs, books, 8 page pull-outs and other promotions

"I modified the symbol for accuracy."

We're polishing our brand.

'Harnessing the Black Hole.'

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

NYC Department of Sanitation

Message in a Plastic Bottle

"So one day all our homes will be completely powered by rubbish. Just like that guy."

"That's one hole filled, only about three or four more to go."

Junk Science. (Scientist sits in lawn chair just outside of junk yard.)

'Tell you what -- just make EVERYTHING biodegradable, okay?'

"Of course, when we landscape the place, we'll get rid of that old washing machine and replace it with one that's indigenous to these parts."

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

Urban Compost Heap.

'...and someday this will all be yours, Son.'