Junior Investor Gifts

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

"Video game? No, I'm using the raise in my allowance to buy back stock."

"Instead of an allowance, I'd like a stock option."

'May I have $50? I want to start my nest egg.'

'I follow my dad's stocks so I know when to ask for an allowance increase.'

The boy who took his piggy bank to the drive thru bank

'...Now just key in your safety pin number...'

'Want to be my partner? I'm starting a mutual fund for kids.'

"Pop, wouldn't my allowance be better off in a stock index fund?"

"I like your reading the financial pages junior. It shows you have an acquisitive mind."

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

MUM! No one wanted to buy my cowpats

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

"If it's all the same to you, I'd like my allowance in bitcoins."

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

Bookstore. The Stock Market for Dummies. It's either an instructional guide or a history of recent economics.

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

"I don't get an allowance. I get earnings per share."

'What my stocks did during my summer vacation...'

'We're going to take a financial risk.'

'He's so spoilt, he has his pocket money paid into a Swiss bank account.'

Graduating students asking for cash donations.

'I don't believe in hoarding cash and gold Dad: I invest in shares online...'

"I think you should provide a 401(k) with my allowance."

'A 7 load? Do you think I was born yesterday? Oh, wait, I was.'

"We shouldn't have sent him to summer financial camp. Today he turned down a new soccer ball--he didn't like its yield to maturity."

'May I have a moment of your time? I'd like to tell you about a plan my bank has for your IRA...'

'Is my allowance an unfunded liability?'

How to live on 25 cents a week allowance.

'Thanks...but according to the web, 80 of kids' allowances are now linked to the Dow.'

Two kids have stands: one Lemonade the other Tooth Fairy Investment Advisor.

Zero interest CDs! Why pay taxes?

'The princess lived happily ever after on her dividends from her investment portfolio.'

'Dad, can I put my pocket money into a pension fund to protect me from the economic winter?'