Jumper Maestro Gifts

Knitting techniques

Fighting Covid

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

Giraffe Portrait

Violin Practise

"... and come out fighting, boys."

"Holy hell. I should not have based my whole personality around this..."

"Home school marching band"

A dancing man wearing a red-striped top

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Where are the kids?'

'You didn't practice last night,did you?'

Arnold's clone refuses to workout: 'You're a huge disappointment, dude.'

When Cows Discovered Mowers

My rebounding blue chips are chipping my blues away...

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard

Musical Prodigy

"It's garage music."

Nest building

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

"After giving advice for decades, my doctor gave me some. He suggested I quit sitting all day."

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

We are on the move. . .

'Spend all morning on a cryptorchidectomy...'

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

"Could you keep still?"

'You say it's milk, oh, oh, I must have hooked up the wrong pipes.'

A bulge of bodybuilders

"I must be getting good, 'cause my dad told to go play for the neighbors!"

"Do you think it's time to switch from the blower to the mower?"

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home form your overseas vacation.

Hairdressing for Bald People

'This bloke is good.' - 'He's even better when he takes his cue out of it's case.'

Ballet Beggar.