Joyful Scholar Gifts

Graduate

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

Science Museum. Why are you skeptical about the things scientists say? Because they claim the universe is expanding but when I visited my childhood hometown, everything was smaller.

'We studied the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper today. May I have an ice cream cone?'

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

'I want to chuck all the spelling and math and just get back to playing with blocks.'

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

'The first exam was easy as ABC, but that one felt more like a D,E or F.'

'Wow! School's only been out for ten minutes, and I've already forgotten everything I learned.'

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

"Finally...school starts next week."

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

"This is quite a surprising discovery."

Planetary Science. What do we call the study of gas giants in space? Gastronomy.

"And I'd recommend this book to anyone in the market for a free plush toy."

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

"Stop the clowning, Johnson. The final isn't going to be all that bad."

"I'll look into it, but you're still in the first grade. Normally, they don't give student loans until you're in college."

"I was master of all I surveyed... then they hit me with second grade."

Academics at the Beach

"Dude, I've never seen you so happy about a 'B' before."

"I got an A+ on my math test! I'm updating my resume."

"Some people call this an elementary school. Not me. I call it pre-med."

"I went to college knowing I wanted to be an astronaut. My parents had only a third-grade education. But they were good teachers. They taught me the importance of hard work...of perseverance...of not being afraid to dream."

Sign by school library reads: 'Passing Lane'

Divinity School - Authorized Parsons Only

"I can't wait to get home and insult my parents from a position of authority."

'Mrs. Wayne was so excited about getting her masters in physical science, she took a quantum leap!'

"Papi, I'm writing my resume!"