Joyful Child Pillows

'If you're a good boy, Santa will bring you tires next year.'

Gracie sees a plane on Christmas Eve and tells her dad Santa is flying it.

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

Serious Putty

'Hey Mister Petrie, what's the world's record for tennis balls in a retriever's mouth?'

'...that 12th piece of fudge I ate must have been bad.'

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

'Dad, what is peace?'

Curtsey

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

'I was cleaning my catapult and it went off.'

"I'd better not eat any more broccoli. I'm saving room for spiritual food."

An old, dancing man holding a steaming cup

'My parents only said 'don't accept rides from strangers,' but I'm the one asking to go with YOU.'

Muy mum rocks.

'Bridges falling down, killer pumpkin eaters...'

'I went to summer school and helped a few teachers decide not to teach there next summer.'

'Do you have bottled spring water?'

A boy holding a balloon

'Please stop...it reminds me too much of the markets.'

'Little girls are made of sugar and spice. Does the American Dental Association know about this?'

'Never, ever give the benefit of doubt to a Brussells sprout.'

'Tell the doctor that I'm too sick to see him.'

"How do you know I got this dirt on me. Maybe I'm biodegrading."

"This is one time of year we count our blessings. . . and not our calories."

"He said the washing machine makes him dizzy."

'No, I can't be the horse, YOU have to be the horse!'

'I think they're offering peace feelers.'

"I can't believe I'm almost five and I'm just now hearing about the helmet fairy."

Skipping with a beard.

"I don't suppose we could discuss this when my Mars isn't in opposition to your Sun?"

"You hugging me? Are you hugging me? I don't see anyone else here... YOU HUGGING ME??"

". . . and this little piggy said 'to heck with it. Let's all go down to the Market Tavern!'"

'Of course I forgive you. That's what friends do. How did you know it fell out of my cone?'