Jovial Jumper Pillows

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"The trees are laughing at us."

'If someone farts in the forest and there's no one around to smell it, does it make a stink?'

Clown Wedding with Rake

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Complaints Desk

'Rex here, is just like one of the family.'

Family doing circus trick heading to the circus.

Death Photobombs a Holiday

Pie chart of pub conversations

You know what I like about our meetings? There's always more finger pulling than pointing.

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

'My client stands before you, a jury of his whittling peers ...'

"And now for the 'piece de resistance!'"

"Look - the FIRST EVER picture of a black hole!! What do you think?"

"I'm doing better. The voices in my head can now access my email."

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

"Growing old is not the problem... it's not being rich that's the problem."

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

"You draw clip-art? What a coincidence - I write Muzak!"

'Let's try again but NO laughing this time!'

"It's important to learn numbers. Then you can have a pin number and get money from ATMs."

Artist angry at jogger running through his painting.

"That's the secret to a happy marriage. We both love the same things."

"What a listener. My burden feels lighter already."

'Don't worry, fifty something is the new thirty something.'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Racing - No. II - IV

Hole drilled in floor. 'That's fixed that.'