Journey Planning T-Shirts

The fate of the emigrant

"You are going on a long journey with two breakdowns and no restaurant facilities.."

'You want to get to London? Well you shouldn't start from here.'

The experienced backpacker.

Tourists

Airlines

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

Airport. Luggage. Baggage. Traveling used to be much less complicated.

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

Heading off with a packed bag

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

Italia tours

"I just..."

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

Where do you see yourself five years from today, dork-boy? 43 Breen Road. What are you talking about? It's where everyone wants to go. It's the most popular AirBnB in San Francisco. The earliest opening they had was five years from today. Just book a hotel. Hotels are so 2007.

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

BIG BOOK OF CAMPER VAN NAMES

Airport

Hotel with sign 'Home sweet temporary home'

"We were thinking about the Himalayas this summer. On the other hand, there's something very special about Montauk."

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

Western Outfitters.

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

Mad For It