Jonathan Swift Fan Gifts

One must steel themselves for Brobdingnagian magnification.

Intelligent people laugh too!

Under pressure.

Pete Sampras

Chris Froome

The most probable explanation to the mind of a sixteen year old tennis star

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

'I'm still trying to build up a following here, but I'm huge in Lilliput.'

'I represent the Lilliput High School basketball team.'

'Relax, teamwork always leads to a slam dunk.'

What's this for? Screwing up my Lacrosse career. Slam! Are you ok, honey? Tough tryout. I thought they had already chosen the team. They have. Now they're determining the pecking order. Is Teddy's health care paid up?

"I see by your copy of 'Newsweek' that Lyndon Johnson has decided not to run for reelection."

Bangtan boys BTS caricature

Tour de France champ Hendrik 'Joop' Zoetemelk

'Hot indeed.'

'The bite was great but you forgot to clutch your face and fall to the ground waving an imaginary card...'

"'I hate Taylor Swift'? Way to lose a lot of the young vote."

"You are a bigger threat to democracy than Russia and China because you didn't invite the Nazis to the conference!"

"This is on me. I did say take us to your leader."

Writing about scientific progress in 1675, Isaac Newton said " If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants." This metaphor is now commonly used to make the point that scientific advances are made using a foundation built by the work of those who came before. That Newton guy was right, you can see further when you're on the shoulders of Giants. I just wonder if he was talking about the players from the football Giants or the baseball Giants. Ernie is a much bigger fan

"I think it was Shakespeare who said 'A meadow that isn't just as lovely from the window of a bullet train isn't lovely at all.'"

'Yeah - baseball, football and hockey...got concussions in all of them.'

If Newton was a Botanist...'Ah, ha, the stem of an apple is not permanently fixed to the tree.'

'Wow! She's fast. She even had time to do her shopping!'

'I forgot to turn on the gravity this morning.'

Follow up Hits to Pants on the Ground.

'Ooooh! Look at this everybody... apparently Mikey here got called up!'

"The irony is I've always considered myself a champion of the little guy."

I'll take speed over security anytime.

"It's not her winning I mind, it's the "I am woman hear me roar" she always yells."

Caution: Oversize Human

"You were doing over eighty miles an hour. What do you expect? I was listening to The Flight of the Bumble Bee."

'Well it doesn't say, son, whether the Lilliputians tested him for steroids.'

'I'll be right with you Mr. Gulliver.'

"This kid soccer league is getting pretty serious."