Jolly Aficionado Gifts

'This child obesity is killing me!'

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"Why do they do that?"

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

"We're following Carrot Top."

Cat fishing whilst fish fly overhead.

What's normal?

Wordplay: Hibernation.

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

Silence of the Chickens...

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

"Not now, Oliver."

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

"I said slime."

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

Mayhem, Inc. Part 1: Prologue

'Hang on a minute: You're not going to transform into a Prince and leave me heartbroken, are you?!'

"Keep looking. She's here somewhere."

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

"Scuba cow"

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

"I believe I have just reached a whole new level of cozy."

Old rocker.

"Hm, still sky high. Let's try the other arm."

Bob's Driving School.

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'