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Tragedy and Material

An Incendiary in the Loft

Comedy Rule

"That's not what I meant when I asked you to put him down. Now you've gone and hurt his feelings."

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

'My analysis indicates the need for an asbestos-ectomy, electrical-graphs and a plumbing-bypass.'

'It started out as a little tree house for the kids and we kept adding on to it.'

Snow Bridge.

Dave took his motto, 'Roofing done in one hour' seriously, even nailing shingles before plywood had been put down.

Town Planning Department

Dave, determined to go green by using only solar powered tools, will hereafter check weather reports before making bids.

Stone henge swing.

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

"That's why safety boots are so important. . . you see? Eddie's feet have stayed perfectly dry."

'If the GPC built office blocks!'

"I think these may be counterfeit bolts."

Toy White House built incorrectly.

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

"No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants."

"We had to put three screws in his neck and a steel plate in his head."

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

"The bank rejected my application for a 2nd mortgage. They said they didn't have 1 in my size."

'Pssst. Go play in your new fun house or you'll hurt daddy's feelings.'

'That's gonna be a big job, boss.'

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

Private work adjustments

"Is this your first bricklaying job, Kevin...?"

Model Village/Realistic Model Village.

'Mystery solved! Someone put the model of the building into the cupboard and the client took the salt cellar.'

"No, having your gingerbread house eaten by kids isn't covered."