Joining A Theatre Group T-Shirts

"You can't beat the smell of the greasepaint..."

'They all want to play the star.'

No Elgar!

Theorbo

Theatre Crowd

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

"I'm Rapunzel. You want Juliet – next tower over."

Patey's in a band! He's so cool!

"If you want to sing in our band, you'll have to overcome your fear of using double negatives."

"Welcome."

'I've got to go, Mom -- my playgroup called an emergency meeting.'

"Sorry, dude. . . but you just don't fit into our group!"

"Tonight the part normally played by the audience will be played by actors playing the part of the audience."

Bassoon practice.

"It's Shakespeare, Mother - please do't keep moaning 'Oh get on with it'!"

Violinist

"I've joined an Eminem tribute band."

to be or not to be

"Let's welcome our new member, Bob!" "You, too!" "'You, too'? Idiot!"

She's a natural.

'Why are they all staring at me?'

Actors' dispute.

Viola jokes are not always suitable chat up lines.

"They were all so good at the auditions, that I couldn't pick just seven."

'Don't get so hot under the collar!'

"For my last trick, ladies and gentlemen, I will push a nine pound human being out of my body..."

"Wow - great chops! We took a vote and want you in the band. All that we need now are three letters of reference and academic transcripts."

"I'm going to pull a seat number from this fish bowl and someone will have a very memorable night at the theater."

Mime tip #37: The noisy upstairs neighbors won't hear your invisible broom knocking.